![]() ![]() Finally, the truth was out – our nine-year marriage was over. Having spent years trying to fix it, crying bucketloads of tears in the process, with that single sentence I finally realised that the relationship was finished. My husband didn’t like to touch, or be touched, and it took me nine years to realise that he had no intention of changing that status quo. This realisation came as a devastating wave after he quit counselling for the second time. I’d encouraged him to seek help shortly after our daughter Kate* was born, when he’d been sacked from his job and wasn’t coping. Our sex life had died completely and I thought if he could talk about his depression and find the tools to help him cope, our physical relationship might improve again.ĭuring one session, the counsellor asked Andrew* if he might be comfortable giving me a weekly massage. He agreed that this was something he could do. ![]() Some days after the session, I asked if he would be able to give me that massage. We turned up for one more session, a dead end, at which the counsellor asked us if we wanted to keep coming. The loss of physical intimacy led the author to seek relationship counselling with her husband but it was soon clear he wasn't interested.
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